The Golden Badger of Wrexham (AKA Torok the Elder), Adam Jones and Karen Fremp sat at one end of a very long table. The Rt HonCarwyn Jones AM First Minister of Wales sat at the other end. Beside Carwyn sat Graham Onllwyn Davies cabinet liaison under secretary to the media and cultural sustainability committee. On the other side of Carwyn sat Glygwyr Owen Pryce Jones of Pryce Jones conceptual envisioning media strategists. Carwyn, Graham and Glygwyr stared, stony faced, at the bowl of Tunnocks Caramels in the middle of the table. The Golden Badger spoke first.
TOROK
Are they for everyone?
GRAHAM
Yeah, no, just, you know…..
Torok scampered across the table and nuzzled through the Tunnocks.
TOROK
Got any tea cakes?
GRAHAM
Just the caramels. I asked them for tea cakes. It’s whatever
they’ve got in…..
TOROK
(to Carwyn)
You’re the most powerful man in Wales?
CARWYN
I can’t abuse my power. What if somebody found out I was
eating all the tea cakes? How would that look?
TOROK
So what’s this about?
Carwyn nodded to Glygwyr.
GLYGWYR
We’ve established you as a team. As a creative, passionate and
robust yet playful and dynamic presence. Yeah?
Adam, Torok and Karen stare at her blankly.
GLYGWYR
What I mean by that is you’ve got a great energy. You’ve gelled
as a team. I believe that you believe. I’m getting ambition, teamwork,
individuality, strength, ruthlessness……… Compassion…..
TOROK
Am I getting another Tunnocks. Is that OK?
GLYGWYR
As many as you like. We’re here until we sort this out.
ADAM
Sort what out?
GLYGWYR
The essence of you. What the public will know you as. What history
will call you. Your name.
ADAM
It’s Adam.
GLYGWYR
The group. The team. What are we going to call you?
KAREN
How about the team?
GLYGWYR
What we want to get across is that being in a superhero team is fun.
GRAHAM
And inclusive. It’s fun and inclusive.
GLYGWYR
As I was saying it needs to be fun or young people won’t relate to it.
ADAM
The Crew.
GRAHAM
Can I just interrupt. Are we promoting? Is this portraying?
I don’t want us to get too, you know it’s… I’m starting to
get the impression that it’s almost aggressively heterosexual.
Adam looks confused.
GRAHAM
Does it reflect a broad ethnic mix?
ADAM
I don’t know?
GRAHAM
This is the sort of thing we need to establish at this stage.
The writing process is very research based. A lot of it is about
the character.
GLYGWYR
Yes we need a distillation of the character of the group. The essence.
GRAHAM
It also has to appeal across the board.
CARWYN
The Crew Team?
GLYGWYR
Love it.
GRAHAM
Is it too culturally narrow? It’s going to have to reflect the diversity
of the funding streams at the end of the day.
GLYGWYR
OK, the European and local regeneration Team Crew.
GRAHAM
In order to work across all of Wales we’ve pulled in funding from the
Social Care Workforce Development Programme grant so we want
some sort of reference to the Standard Spending Assessment formula.
GLYGWYR
Right.
GRAHAM
Quite catchy. Might I suggest…. The Standard Spending
Assessment and European Social Fund Communities First
Avengers. SSAESFCFA for short.
KAREN
Might I suggest lunch?
Conceptual envisioning media strategists!!!??? *snort* hehehe
Oh God!!!! I’ve been in meetings like this. At the Assembly!
It’s a work of fiction.
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Reblogged this on notes to the milkman and commented:
Will the Keeper of the Text ever get rescued?! 😦
If it can be done in a way that is both inclusive and involves multi-agency strategic sustainability with accountability as its underpinning dynamic then yes. Thanks for the rebloggage 🙂